The Promise Ring

Train honked to break trance, making their locked eyeballs move from left to right, searching for an answer from the other.

Why was the heart so heavy, why was it so hard to break the eyelocked, as if some strong magnetic force was holding them, not allowing them to break the eyelock.

Hustle- bustle on the side cabin, forcing Jhanak to give him a smile, indicating he needs to go. But her heart was not allowing her to pull out her hand from his hand

“Take care Sir ji” she said, her voice shivered 

“You are leaving at last. You must be happy now” he said, his last attempt to listen from her that she won’t be happy to be away from him

“I will survive. You should happily start your new life with …”

“Jhanak, take care, be alert, stay safe and you know, I am just a call away. Just a call away, Jhanak.” He did not let her speak about her favorite sister. At this moment he just wanted each second to feel her, there was not a tiniest space for anyone

Jhanak nodded with a heavy heart. The train made another honk and announced that the train would soon start. Jhanak slowly moved her fingers and then Ani with a heavy heart made movement of his fingers, with their eyes glued. Their hands separated and then Ani moved backward to leave the cabin,while both maintaining the eyelock as much as they could.

Ani waited on the platform till the train disappeared from his eyes. As the train disappeared from his eyes, Chotton tapped his shoulder, breaking his trance. Ani turned all lost at Chotton

“Train is gone Ani”

“Train is gone” he repeated and realization hit him. He stumbled back – she is finally gone. Chotton held his arm to stable him “Ani, are you okay”

Ani simply looked at Chotton, lost enough to consider answering him. Chotton as if understood the storm behind his silence.

“Come sit..” Chotton simply opened the door for Ani. Like a robot, Ani sat behind the steering wheel and drove home.

Jhanak kept looking outside the window trying her best to get the view of her Sirji as far as she could. But the train soon picked up speed. Lifeless, she threw her back on the seat. Tears were welling up and ready to pour out but like always, she held them. By now she had expertise on holding up her tears, innumerable times that she has done it.

Sirji has booked a first class cabin for her. She looked around the empty cabin and realized this was her life now, empty.

The silence of the cabin, the train on the track and her tiredness took over Jhanak and she drifted into the long sleep.

Anirudh reached home, all broken, completely lost to observe that his family were already seated in the hall, the courtroom of the living room was ready to start its day.

Lost in his own state, he did not even put an effort to comprehend that they were seated there, waiting like an eagle to attack him with their questions. Ani simply took the stairs to his room. If Jhanak was not there, he wanted to be left alone and ponder on her memories.

“Ani..” Arshi called out loudly, seeing him ignore her and going toward his room

“Ani…” “Ani…” “Ani…” the other called out as well, to gain his attention but Ani was in his own world, memories of Jhanak’s hand slipping out of him, the train moving away, was revolving in his brain, making a filter to the words coming from the living hall.

Ani slumped down on the ground near his bed, supporting his back on the footboard. His eyes went on the ring that she had made him wear. He kept looking at the ring, reminiscing the moment that they had shared last night.

Ani had been restless and every knock on the door had given the hope that it was Jhanak. Frustration had taken over him, finding every other person but her.

“Not once does she want to meet me before she leaves. Kitni beraham ho tum Jhanak. To prove that you do not care, to prove that I do not mean anything to you, to prove me that you are happy with my marriage with Arshi, you can be this harsh on me”

He had been in pain when there was again a knock on the door and that one knock last night had changed everything in him. He was a changed man with a clear vision.

Ignoring the knock, thinking it must again be someone, he was pacing in the room when the person made the second knock

He composed himself and opened the door, well in mood to shoo away whoever it was only to find Jhanak there. Relief ran through him but soon the anger replaced it

“Itni raat ko, yaha kya ker rahi ho tum”

“Sirji, can I come inside” He moved aside to let her in

Jhanak turned and slightly closed the door. 

“I know I should have not come to your room at this hour. If anyone will see then it will again be a big drama”

“Will you cut the crap about the whole world and their thoughts and come straight to the point” he said irritated with the fact that she is after all leaving

“I am leaving tomorrow Sirji, still all I get is your anger on last night of my stay”

“Why do you even care, Jhanak. If I am angry or not, will it change your decision?”

“Pata hai naraz hain aap aur aapko aise naraz chorker kaise chali jaaon”

Ani’s eyes went on the packet she was holding. “What’s this?” Jhanak looked at him and tried to give him a smile and then held his wrist. Ani looked at her surprised. 

“Come” she took him to the bed and requested him to take the seat and herself sat beside him

“Sirji, Why are you so upset about my leaving. You wanted me to give exams right”

“I want you to give exams, Jhanak but then you’re being stubborn about continuing your stay there. Do you know how helpless you have made me feel?”

“Humesha to yahan nahi reh sakti na Sirji. “

“Kyun Janak, kyun nahi”

“Kaise?Kaise sirji. Kiss haq se”

“Haq mil jayega to wapis aa jaogi”

“Kaise ” her heart cried. Her heart felt greedy at that moment but she cannot be weak. She cannot ruin everything for sirji and cannot ruin the name of her mother further

“Bolo, mil jayega toh wapis aa jaogi”

“Can’t take the rights that are not mine. Cannot take someone else’ right.”

The woods are lovely, dark and deep,   

But I have promises to keep,   

And miles to go before I sleep,   

And miles to go before I sleep.

-Robert Frost

Everything about being around him was so lovely, so tempting. Amidst all the allegations and hurtful words of people around, his presence around her compensated every single pain for Jhanak. And that was it, she knew searching for this comfort in him was wrong and the only solution was for her to go forever.

“Jahank, bohut ziddi ho tum. I have been incapable of ensuring your self respect here and you going away proves it. Tum chali jaoogi toh main…”

Janak placed a finger on his lips, sending several sensations through him

“Sir Ji, I will go but before I disappear from you life, I wanted to gift you something”

“I am worried for you. I am worried about what will happen to your life once you go there and you want to compensate for it with a gift. You got scared from the world Jahank”

“No Sirji, ek baar sun lijiye” she pleaded

“Hmmm..” she opened the box and it had a ring. Ani took the box from her and scanned the ring

“It is so costly. Why are you wasting your money”

“I have got something for you Sirji, that itself increased the value of my money to ten folds” her words made him look into her eyes, trying to scan it and read it. What did it hold?

She placed the box in his hand. “Sirji, this ring is a promise. It is a promise that you can rest assured and set aside all your fears. I will not do anything in my life that will hurt you.

This is also a promise that I will never ever marry anyone, I will not sirji. I know it should not matter to you, but I felt like conveying this to you, be what, I will never ever marry anyone. No force can make me do that. That is my promise to you. Main haq lene nahi, haq dene aayi thi Sirji

”

Ani’s heart elated and pained at the same time. What did she mean? How could he convey the same to her? No he cannot, she won’t let him. But Ani wanted to make that promise to himself and her

“ I don’t wish a lonely life for you. But I want you to keep your promise to keep your life safe.”

“Nahi karoongi, just wanted to let you know” tears were already flowing like streams from her eyes. Ani didn’t want to argue about that, her tears were tearing him apart. Is he doing right by allowing her to leave? He wondered. But he wanted to keep some promise for her, very deeply within.

 “If you want me to have this ring, make me wear it.”

“Sirji!!!”

“If you want me to believe that your promise is true, you will make me wear this ring”

Jhanak hesitated but then Ani kept looking at her. His eyes asked her to stamp on her promise. She gave up lastly, how could she deny his wish? That was the problem, she could never deny his wishes

She tried all the fingers but the ring had to only fit on his ring finger. The moment the ring was in his finger, Ani looked at it and gave a promising look to Jhanak

“I will always keep this ring on Jhanak. By wearing it forever, I give the same promise back to you”

“Sir ji!! What are you saying? Do you even know what that means? I do not need any promise”

“But the promise is made Jhanak, never to be broken”

“Sirji, please don’t make a promise which is impossible to keep. You have a life ahead withhh….” This time he placed his finger on her lips and their eyes locked for eternity, tears just making it’s stream through her cheeks.

The knock on the door brought Anirudh back to reality, she was gone. His heart felt heavy and thus making him lethargic to get up and respond to the Knock, which he knew will bring useless rows of verbal interaction. Nothing made sense anymore, everything was meaningless. She was gone, leaving his life empty.

There was again a knock and another and another. “Ani open the door” Arshi’s voice

“Ani…you cannot just ignore everyone like this” came Memsahib’s voice

Then his mother and then Dada and then his Baba.

At last Anirudh dragged himself to open the door

“Ani, how could you do this?”

Came a demanding question from Arshi. He looked at her confused. Does this alien Arshi even matter to him that he should bother to answer her question. No, he did not know this alien person. He had once liked a girl in her who had progressive thoughts, who was careeristic and talked of the growth of society. He never knew that behind that facade was this person. All her mask has fallen and she is an alien to him. 

“Ani, I am waiting for an answer” she demanded 

“Answer to what?” he asked still lost

“Ani, you need to answer to Arshi. How could you just come upstairs like this?”

“It was very simple. I do not think I need to give my attendance to Arshi and you all and then take your permission to even come to my room. It was very simple, I wanted to come to my room and I came. Does I ask all of you or Arshi for that matter, where she goes the whole day ”

“Ani, how can you talk this way” pitched in Bipasa

“Sorry but no sorry. This is what I am. Can I get some peace in my room now?”

“Ani you need to answer some things or else I have to rethink about this marriage”

Arshi warned

“Arshi, if you want to cancel this marriage because I decline to be a puppet in your hand, I cannot stop you. For now, I need some rest” and he closed the door. He was in no mood of mannerism and sweet talk. No one understood him, why should he?