The Conflict

Maan stood still at the gate of his one-bedroom house in a low income group society in city of Mumbai as rain poured heavily in the first week of July.

The heavy pouring rain was making loud sound but nothing went into Maan’s ear as he was lost in hearing the conflicting voices of his heart and brain. The cool breeze along with rain were unable to free him from feeling chocked.

Today, first time in life he felt the need to put his step on the rain. Why he felt that the rain, which he hated so much, would give him answer to his conflicting heart? He knew the answer was her. She loved rain. 

He hated rain. Rain took away everything from her and him, leaving them alone to deal with hardship of life. She loved rain, as rain had given her everything thing, rain has given her Maan. 

Today when she was not with him, how can he hate something that she loves so much. 

After long pause at the gate, Maan placed his first step on the rain. The heavy rain completely drenched him in just couple of steps.

He went ahead on the walking pavement, looked up and let the rain drain him. He closed his eyes to get flashes on her pleading eyes in front of him. Her beautiful eyes had looked at him with expectations and faith. But he failed miserably. Unable to bear those innocent expectant eyes, he let the rain take his pain away.

For her, Maan was everything, her world revolved around him and today he had snatched that everything from her.

He felt suffocated even in heavy rain. He opened his arms wide, looked up at rain and cried loudly “Geee-eeeet”.  Feeling strength less he slid down on ground and sat on his knees, his hands on his thighs he kept crying, letting tears roll down his cheeks, mingling it with water droplets of rain.

Maan somehow gathered strength and walked few more steps, letting the heavy rain wetting him more.  He sat on the bench and smiled as he remembered their conversation when he must be some 13-14 years and Geet some 8-9 years old.

“Geet, come inside. Rain is causing all mud and dirt. This rain will make you sick like last year.

“No Maan, rain doesn’t cause dirt, it washes away all and make you fresh. I love dancing in rain”

And she ran far away enjoying the feel of rain. Maan hated it but he had no option. He went in rain to bring her back to their tent. Last year she got sick due to rain and he had to run to local dispensary with her, off course orphan kids from slum does not have money to visit, air-conditioned hospitals. He got free medicine from dispensary itself.

He hated rain, it always brought misery in his life. It had done the same to her but she loved it because rain made her meet him. They were together because of rain. She had no grudges with rain as she did not remember actually what happened when she was some 4-5 years’ old. It was him who have told her the story of the monster flood which separated him from his mother and her from her grandmother. His mother had made him sit on the rescue boat and then took little Geet from her grandmothers’ arm and placed in his lap.

Little Geet was excited to be seated in the boat and finding a new friend on whose lap she was placed.

Maan was big enough to know that the flood was destructing everything in their slum. His eyes at that moment was fixed on his mother while Geet’s on her new friend’s face.

“Maan Go. Take care of this girl, Geet. We will be coming when the next rescue boat arrive. I will meet you there.”

But Maan was scared and his fear came true, when after waiting for a day neither his mother arrived nor Geet’s grandmother. All slum kids were there and only few adults. Adults, who themselves were devastated and had to make arrangements for their kids.

The rain had poured more in coming days only making condition worse and news kept coming to his eager ears that most left on that slum lost their lives. He had waited and waited for days for his mother and Geet’s grandmother to come. But the little boy did not have advantage of just waiting, he had to run to catch the food packet that the rescue team dropped from the helicopter. He would somehow manage to get two packets, one for little girl left with him and one for himself.

“Thak Thak” he was brought back to present by the police officer hitting the side of bench he was sitting on

“Hey! Why are you sitting here? Are you drunk or homeless?” asked police man rudely. He was used to that tone from most, since childhood.

“No sir, I am not drunk sir. My home is there in that society and I am a clerk in private company Sir.”

“Okay-Okay.” Policeman calmed down. “Then why are you sitting here brother? Wife threw you out?” he laughed in joke but it hit Maan

“I pushed her out, out of the house I bought for her; pushed her out of my life, when all she had only wished was to be by my side. How could I?” he felt chocked again as he cried with his hand on his face. Policeman patted him and left, understanding that the man was in some turmoil.

Maan too stood and kept walking. The rain was still pouring and for the first time he wanted it to keep pouring. Rain connected him with her, how could he ask for it to stop. How he wished, if this rain can even wash away all the conflicts that he has in his heart.

His heart was loudly crying and shouting at him – His decision to send her away was wrong. But his mind had argued and won – how could he be wrong. It was one chance for him to take her out of poverty. Poor people don’t get such golden opportunity to be rich, she was getting one. How could he be selfish to listen to her and keep her with him.

Rich man, Nishant, had asked her hand, he was going to make her his wife, how could he not let it happen? What will she get with him? His poverty? His struggle to keep inflow of bread butter in house? His clerk job in private factory, all it could give him was minimum descent food and clothing and rest salary would only go into the loan of the house and motorbike that he had got.

He laughed sarcastically – he got these for her. What will he do with them now?

Now the wind was so strong along with the rain, as if all were trying to move him. The huge trees were making sound. He felt they were all shouting at him for breaking her heart. Yes, he was a sinner to break her heart. He was her world and he has pushed her far from her world. But if she is getting better world she has to leave this trash world of his.

“Maan please don’t send me to Marry that Nishant. I am yours Maan, I have only thought of you as my husband, how can you let someone marry me? Please Maan don’t do this”

Unable to see her tears, he had turned his back to her “We are no husband wife Geet. What we did was not true. It was all childish act to save ourselves from questions of these people. I had told you even then that it was all not true at all”

She had held his wrist and turned him towards herself

“Why don’t you remember what I told you? That you will only be my husband and nothing we said was lie for me. I can’t breathe without you Maan, how will those monies keep me happy?”

As he kept walking alone, the speeding car splashed water from puddle and the mud filled water came all over him. Unlike most times, today he did not mind. She loved to play in the puddle of rain. He again went back to past of her love of rain

Maan had come back to their hut after whole day of work. First he had gone to local coaching and then after his coaching, he had to work there itself to pay his tuition, Geet’s tuition and earn for minimal bread and butter.

Maan could not leave study as it was his mother’s wish. She wanted him to study like all legitimate kids of Khurana Ji did in huge mansion. Being a slum kid, even at age of 9-10, Maan knew he was illegitimate Kid of that monster Khurana Ji but his mother always convinced him, “Khurana Ji married me secretly. We loved each other.”

“Yes and he left you in this slum after you had me inside you. Had you agreed to drop me, he would have happily kept you.” And he had earned strong slap.

“Study or you will keep talking slangs like this. Khurana Ji’s kids don’t talk like this”

“I am only your son” Maan had shouted and ran outside. He very well knew from slum gossip that Khurana Ji was smitten by his mother’s beauty and had sweet talked his mother, who worked at his mansion as house maid. When she had denied his physical approach, he had secretly married her to convince for physical relation. But once Maan was inside her, she got reality check in hardest ways.

Anyways, after long day of work, when Maan had come inside the hut, he found Roti and Sabzi prepared and covered but the one who had prepared it was nowhere.

“It’s raining, where must this girl be?” he kept his hand on his fore head “Ohh no, not again”

He went outside in rain, he so hated but this girl made him always go in rain.

“Geet- Geet” he had shouted all along only to find her jumping in the puddle. But he had stopped, mesmerized by her beauty. She loved rain and rain did wonder on her. Her skin glowed with rain water all over her face. She was growing, some 16 years old now and her curves held his eyes. He soon jerked himself and turned other side. How he controlled day and night, with her being around him in small space, only he knew.

“She claims she is your wife; doesn’t mean she really is. You have to marry her to rich guy one day Maan.” He looked down only to get view of her beautiful leg where his gifted anklets were dancing as she jumped in puddle.

She loved this anklet more than any rich girl would love the real gold or silver jewelry. Maan had bought it for her from local fair in mere 10 rupees. Her happiness had no bound. He would buy such small-small fake jewelries for her from fair, once in a while.

“Why are you so happy about these. They are not any real gold or even silver” He would be upset with himself for being poor and buying such cheap stuffs for her.

“I have never seen gold or silver. These are precious for me; You, my husband bought it for me.” He would jerk his hand from her.

“How many times have I told you to not call me your husband, we are no husband wife. You will study, do job somewhere and then marry some rich guy. The marriage we faked was to save us from people’s question only. It was child thing, you know that. It was for your safety only, that shopkeeper had bad eyes on you.”

“But we did marry and for me it was true. You placed marriage stuff on me, we circled the fire.” Then she had bowled him by her innocent question

“If you get a rich girl, will you leave me Maan?” there was deep fear in her eyes. He had held her shoulder hard “How dare you say that” he was shaking even with that thought

“Then how dare you say that about me. I will die the moment any other man place his hand on mine for marriage. Remember this Maan.” The determination in her eyes, every time she had claimed this had scared Maan.

Memory of her determined eyes brought him back to reality in jerk “I will die the moment any other man places his hand on mine for marriage” rang in his ears.

“Ohh no, what have I done?” he stood still for couple of minutes to realize Geet and her determined eyes.

He looked at the watch, it was 9:30 pm. Marriage will start in half an hour. He turned back, rushed towards his society, grabbed his motorbike

“Geet wait for me, I am coming” he shouted with clarity. Rain has washed away all his inner conflict and brought clarity of real happiness of hers.

He reached the marriage venue in 20 minutes, it was crowded with people. Marriage has not yet started he knew; as she will never let it start.

He ran towards the marriage location and shied in relief as his eye went on her standing in corner, ladies trying to talk to her.

“No use trying ladies, she will not listen” he laughed to himself

“Gee-eet” he shouted.

The happiness of Geet could be felt as she pushed the ladies and ran towards him

“Maa-aan” she came running and hugged him tight, making everyone shocked. He hugged her back even tighter.

He then checked her palm and as he had guessed, he found handful of tablets, he immediately threw them away. She looked at him in smile, lost and dreamy

“I knew you will come. This was just to delay process here if it takes you time to realize” she said confidently.

He asked forgiveness to Nishant, made her sit on their bike and zoomed back to their house.

Happiness seeped in as all his conflicts were washed away and as she always said, rain again united them, this time forever.