Chapter 16: Apprehension

More one month passed and Geet’s and Annie’s training would now end in few days. Geet led her usual life – Weekdays busy in office and its assignment and weekend grocery, cleaning house and clothes etc.

In between she kept calling her family. Geet did not hide from her family now that she had least interaction with Maan, esp. her Mom, who would wait to hear about Maan. She explained the huge difference and how far he has gone in life. So by now all knew, Geet was living on her own and she was trying to be strong.

“Did you make friends? Make friends Geet and go around city with them” Meera and Brij would explain in their own way.

“I will, I am trying. Only if someone click for good friendship. Anwesha hai na”

“Annie is Maan’s sister Geet. Just see if he is OK with your friendship with her. But anyways, she is not Annie for you, she is Anwehsa Khurana. She will have her own life and you won’t fit there.”

“Yeah Di, I understand. She is only my friend in training. But she is very nice. I feel good with her but scared if Maan Sir will think otherwise. He anyways has no reason to think good about me” she gave small painful laugh

“Maan Sir…. Hmmm…. Ok, just try gelling with others and go, do London site seeing.”

“Ok Di. After training, when I join project I will try making friends” She tried to buy time

“Ok Good. Be strong girl and enjoy London.”

Maan went to Annie’s room to check on her “So working on assignment? How is the training going?”

“Training is going great Bhai and I have to work on these assignments. Ohh that Geet completes all assignment so diligently, I will look like a spoilt rich brat sister of yours if I don’t do it too. So here I am finishing this up.”

Maan was really confused. Yeah he has checked her college scores, she has done brilliant. It was actually shocking for him. He had to push her to study, so in his absence she somehow did study and performed not only well but excellent. Maan had no idea, all Geet did after he left was her study and remembering him. He had on other side done many more things and explored his life, Business being on top, hobbies, many sporting activities and new people and much more. But listening from Annie, her sincerity, it was still tough for him to digest.

Annie broke his thought “Bhai but I am upset with you”

“Why? What did I do now?”

“You did not once come to check my training. It’s almost going to get over” she made a baby face. Yes, Maan felt bad for Annie. To save himself from a situation, he was avoiding to visit her training. This was not fair for Annie. Why would his sister miss his attention anyways due to someone else? She already has missed his care, when he was busy making his career and taking care of someone else.

“Okay, will be there tomorrow and be prepared, I will be asking questions.” He smiled and left.

It was 11 am and Geet and Anwesha were in the training session. When the trainer stopped and his focus went on the entrance

“Good Morning Sir” Maan gave small node “Good Morning”

Geet’s eye along with Anwesha went on door. Her heart beat raced, seeing him from so near after their first meet. But his eyes were on his sister and smile on his face “Bhaii”

He gave her stern look “Okay sir” he lovingly hit her head, completely ignoring the other trainee. He was Maan Singh Khurana who came to check on his sister to fulfill her wish.

“Good Morning sir” Geet said in low voice as she raised from her seat

“Good Morning” he gave small node and turned his focus to trainer

“So how is Anwesha doing?” he said taking his seat. Authority just poured out of him.

“Sir she is doing great. She completes all her assignments and is very competitive with Geet”

“Show your work” he forwarded his chair towards Anwesha. Not a single look at Geet. She was simply a new joinee who did not need attention of the head of such big company. Trainer understood that Boss is going to check his sister’s progress in depth

Trainer turned to Geet “Geet you can have 15 minutes break.”

“Ok sir” and Geet got up from seat to leave.

“Half an hour” he said loudly his eyes still on Anwesha’s work. Geet quietly left out from other side, trying best to not cross the path of siblings.

Geet kept her calm till she reached washroom and there her tears simply flowed uncontrollable. How unwanted she was for him, he made it so clear. She has realized it all, made herself strong and convinced herself but then facing it directly pained and chocked involuntarily. She felt so suffocated. She was in no condition to explain herself with arguments. It was hurting deep within and she let the tears flow. She sat on bench in ladies restroom.

Shasha, a senior entered the washroom “Hey! Are you OK? You are trainee with Anwesha, right? What happened?”

Geet immediately wiped her tear “Fine Mam. Just feeling nostalgic. I will be fine”

“You sure?” “Yeah Ma’am”

“Ok. Take care. Let me know if you need anything” and she went to freshen up and left.

It took minimum ten minutes for Geet calmed herself down.

Geet went out in office park area and sat on bench. She went down the old memory lane and smile formed on her face. How Maan would check her work. How she would be busy doing this and that and he would be sincerely checking her work, her progress, guide her how to improve etc. He was so involved with her, always making sure her everything was well prepared. But this Maan was different, he has nothing to do with her. How can it happen but? He was pained and upset with her to extreme and she owed it. That part she clearly got and she knew she was to be blamed completely for his being upset with her.

But this indifference, like he does not care how she is settling in this new country, how she is progressing, how she is handling things alone. He actually had nothing to do with her. Was it all her imagination that Maan loved her back then. He had never voiced it. She had asked him in so many ways and he would smile or smartly change the topic. He was attracted to her and he never hesitated to agree on that but he never ever said he loved her.

Ufff… then that makes her guilt even bigger. So all that she did with him, thinking he loved her and that she owned him that way was all so wrong. He bore all her acts because of his debt to her family and not because he had any feelings for her?

More than the pain that he never ever loved her or had feelings for her, she was filled with self-loath. In that case, had she been kind of raping him and he had taken all as part of debt “Chiiii”.

“No No it can’t be true.. I … I always loved him. I know my ways were so stupid but I always thought we were one. Not that what I did, even if he loved me was correct but if he had no feelings then?”

Then she needed bigger punishment. This is just nothing. And after self-loath dawned the reality

“He never ever loved her” Now Geet felt her whole life was meaningless. How shallow and empty she felt her whole life was and is. Her life from childhood revolved around a person who was just there with her due to his debt.

All wrong that she has done, all tantrums and all rights she has shown to Maan, who at back of her mind, was hers. They were one, it had always been behind her mind. But if he was never hers then? Then she has done all those thing to a person who was not hers.

“Chiii Chii”

No but it can’t be true. She in no case hundred percent be convinced that Maan had no feeling for her back then, that he let her do all those because of his debt and not because he was hers by heart. That anger in his eyes when he had seen Rohan’s hand on her bare back. That rage full hit on Rohan from him, without him thinking of any consequences. His questioning eyes to her and then him pulling her to him with all right to fix her bra. She had been in shame; Rohan’s touch had pained her but when Maan’s finger had touched her skin as he was placing the buttons of her Bra was like balm on that pain. It felt like a holy touch which was healing her, though he was so angry on her, all he thought at that moment was of her respect.

So how can she be convinced that Maan had no feelings for her. No No he had or is she trying to falsely convince herself to lessen her self-loath.

She closed her eyes to conclude – Maan was most beautiful thing of her life and she was the curse of his life. Took a heavy breath and got up.

As she was about to enter the premise all lost, she hit someone and she looked up to realize it was him. Immediate feeling of impuring him with her dirty touch she moved far away

“I… I am sorry. I am so-so sorry sir. I should watch while walking”

“It’s Ok” he shook his head and moved forward. Geet went inside the premise, Maan turned and kept looking at her, bewildered with this new girl.

No he can’t be bewitched by this new girl and break him again.

The Rohan fiasco had broken his mirage of all her false claim of love to him, whole her life. Did he ever mind all stupid things she did with him, never; it was between them, it was their thing.

“Only times I have stopped her doing something was for her, only to protect her. When was I not hers but was she ever mine. No, never. Sab jhuth tha uska. Yeh bhi sab jhut hee hai”

That Rohan’s incident, simply broke the mirage he had been living into. How stupid of him it was, to have taken her stupid rant of ‘I love you’ to be serious. He had got hard slap on his face with entry of that Rohan.

All those things between them that he thought was theirs, was nothing. With Rohan’s entry, she showed him mirror that all that he took from her was only as price of debt and nothing else.

“For her it was all part of debt, maine he dil….” He stopped not able to take the pain he has been subsiding.

His heart had been broken into pieces and pieces.

He had worked hard to join those pieces and bring strong exterior structure of him, which all saw as strong Maan Singh Khurana. Inside, he was still working to join those pieces. Broken pieces inside him, which only he knew how it pricked. Now that she has come back, he cannot let her do that to him again. He has nothing to do with her. It was her life and all he knew was she was shrewd enough to manage her ways in this new country. Also, he had been clearly asked to keep away, especially from her. If they would need his interference in her setup, they would have asked him. He was not needed. Also Uncle would have taken care of all facilities of his princess, so he better focus on his life, his family and wonderful friends that he has. Why should he ignore all wonderful people who loved and cared for him and waste his time on her?

Maan then scolded himself – Why the hell is he even thinking about her. She was just a new joiner as trainee in his company. Why was he even giving that level of attention on his thought on her?